Film Review: Battleship

Battleship. Rated M (science fiction violence). 131 minutes. Directed by Peter Berg. Written by Erich Hoeber and Jon Hoeber.

Verdict: An annihilation-fuelled, action-packed sci-fi war movie hybrid that is as long as it is loud.

For many of us, they were little blue boxes with their plastic grids into which you placed your little plastic grey battleships before calling out coordinates to your opposing fleet commander. Then, using oddly-shaped plastic ‘hit’ and ‘miss’ markers, you would begin to record your success – with the first fleet commander to sink the opposing fleet winning the game.

Fond memories of somewhat more passive and relaxed rules of engagement on the high seas were momentarily re-ignited before being pummelled to near death by the end of this long, loud, explosive, high-tech take on the strategy of naval warfare – turning the simple game of strategy and luck into a no holds barred Terminator/Predator/Transformers/Aliens inspired assault on the senses.

When his directionless younger brother Alex (Taylor Kitsch) falls foul of the law impressing the beautiful Samantha (Brooklyn Decker), Stone Hopper (True Blood’s Alexander Skarsgård) insists that Alex finally learn the importance of self-discipline by joining him in the navy. Having dutifully signed up, Alex joins his brother participating in the Rim of the Pacific Exercise – the largest international maritime exercises held near Hawaii. Shortly after the exercises have commenced, the participants discover that alien spaceships have arrived to exterminate the human race and take over our planet.

After a long and tedious set-up about all that’s at stake, Mr Berg (Hancock) and cinematographer Tobias Schliessler (The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3, Hancock) escort us with supreme confidence into the jaw-dropping conflict that is at the heart of the Hoeber Brothers’ (Red, Whiteout) mercilessly efficient screenplay.

The relentless devastation wreaked by the invading alien forces is incredibly intense – with one high-octane, decimation following another. The cast, which also includes Rihanna, Liam Neeson and Japanese star Tadanobu Asano, throw themselves into the chaos with complete abandon – with Mr Kitsch (the regrettable John Carter) comfortably accounting for his duties as the film’s leading man.

And a post-credits sequence suggests a sequel will be with us before you can say ‘Hit!’ or ‘Miss!’. Whichever of those it is will depend entirely on whatever is left of your tolerance for overloaded sequences of action-packed, jaw-dropping annihilation.

This review was commissioned by the Geraldton Newspaper Group.